


Nothing Wrong With Being Hufflepuff

by storiesfortravellers



Category: Daria (Cartoon), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crack, Gen, Smartassery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-30
Updated: 2012-09-30
Packaged: 2017-11-15 08:18:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/525133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storiesfortravellers/pseuds/storiesfortravellers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if Daria and Jane were students at Hogwarts?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nothing Wrong With Being Hufflepuff

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Fall Fandom Free-for-All on livejournal, run by oxoniensis
> 
> Prompt was HP/Daria cracky crossover

"Miss Lane! Are you sure that you're following my instructions precisely?"

"I'll check again, Professor Snape," Jane responded.

From the row behind them, Daria and Jane could hear Draco whisper, "What can you expect from a Mudblood?"

"Listen, blondie," Jane said as she turned around, "Mention my parents again and I'll shove this griffin claw so far up your - "

"Problem, Miss Lane?" Professor Snape asked as he appeared again by their table.

"No, Professor Snape," Jane sighed, and the professor left to scare students on the other side of the room again.

"Hey, Daria," Draco whispered when Snape was out of earshot, "Sorry to hear Luna beat you."

"What?"

"It must be hard knowing you're only the second weirdest girl at Hogwart's," Draco quipped as he and his lab partner snickered.

Daria replied, "And it must be hard for you to measure out all these ingredient ratios without calling your daddy and asking him to outlaw math."

"Hey! Watch it, Morgendorfer" Draco spat.

"Watch what?" Jane said, looking around as if she hoped she weren't missing anything, "Oh, you mean watch IT? Is it here then? Is it here?"

"What?" Draco asked, confused.

"The day you're better than Harry Potter at something. You keep saying it's coming but I never get to see it."

Daria suggested helpfully, "Hey, maybe it's blocked by something huge that nobody can see around. Like Draco's ego."

"Oh funny!" Draco scowled, "Why don't you two just make it official and join the Mudbloods and Freaks Club?"

"I'm not really much of a joiner," Daria said.

"And besides," said Jane, "If we did that, we wouldn't be able to see you at the meetings for Future Buttmonkeys of He Who Sucks Too Much To Be Named."

They hushed when they saw Snape approaching again. He asked archly, "And am I to assume that your potions are done since you are having such a wonderful time chatting in my class?"

"They've been harassing us, Professor," Draco said.

Jane rolled her eyes. But Daria said, "That's true, we've been asking them in amazement how they finished their potion so fast."

"Oh?" Professor Snape said with a raised eyebrow, "Then let's see it Malfoy."

Malfoy's eyes went wide with terror. "No, see - I'm not finished, I just -"

"Mr. Malfoy! I suggest that next time you spend less time trying to impress these young ladies and more time learning the material!"

"But - " Draco sighed. "... yes, Professor Snape."

"Hm," Snape said, as he turned around and walked away. He tried not to smile as he walked away, and wished - not for the first time - that that devious girl were assigned to Slytherin. It would make his life so much more amusing.


End file.
